Tonight, Homegirl, Hotcakes, Doña Guajira y yo got to run through our solos with the musicians. I can tell you that Homegirl, Doña and I were fairly terrified because we know that all kinds of things can happen when live music and amateur dancers are involved. Hotcakes is way above our level — she just cruises in, does her thang and all is well. But for the rest of us, this is some serious pressure.
To our relief, though, all went pretty well. There might have been a few hiccups, but we all made it through our dances a couple of times each. I was so impressed with us! I can see we’ve all progressed over the last year. I can’t speak for the other ladies, but here’s what I took away from tonight…
First, I’m not as afraid of live music as I was seven months ago when I first did a solo. The first time is a bear. I was so hung up on “OMG, I’m out here ALONE for the first time!” that I had a harder time listening and going with the flow. This time I actually heard the music, and even when I messed up, I understood why.
Second, I am no longer afraid of the sound of my feet, so it’s easier to stay in compás and focus on completing the footwork. I didn’t completely trip over my feet like I did back in May. Oh God, I hope I didn’t just jinx myself…
The third thing I took away isn’t a positive, but I guess it’s positive that I recognize it: I still get nervous when I have an audience. Not as nervous as I did before, but nervous enough to where I feel my body tense up and I could see it as I was watching myself in the mirror. But at least I’m aware and I can try to find a way to breathe and relax so that my movements are more fluid.
But all in all, everything was good. To top it off, Teacher gave us all hugs, kisses and kudos when it was over. And that was so nice! We’re all so OCFD, self-deprecating and constantly worried about letting her down, so those little encouragements mean a lot to us. Seriously, THAT is what it’s all about.
Ok, now that that’s out of the way, I think I can actually sleep tonight. Tomorrow night it’s back to the studio for a session with the Hot-Butt Crew. Expect another entry tomorrow…
Married to the Dance 